1. Remember that you’re a fucking genius, hysterically funny and really popular.
2. Get super dressed up and spend an inordinate amount of time on your hair and makeup, just to go get groceries or perform other mundane tasks.
3. Remember Jock Jams? from the 90s? Spotify that shit and get down in your bedroom.  Like, seriously, shake it.
4. Make a list of 10 things you want to do before you die, and indulge the most exciting one you can come up with.  That may mean taking ONE action step towards achieving the goal of your choice (e.g. if you want to sing at Carnegie Hall, start practicing your scales).
5. Masturbate.  Regularly.  (or have sex, whichevs)
6. Wrap your body head-to-toe in something hyper-comfortable, like warm bath water, fresh sheets or maybe an old cashmere Juicy jumpsuit?  Remember those?  I’m 90s-reminiscing like whoa.
7. Name five genuine interests you hold, other than food and weight loss.  Seriously, five.  Are you having trouble?  Think harder.
8. Just for a moment, pretend that God is a fact.  Does he give a shit about your weight?  I mean, come on.  What other gifts has the Universe bestowed upon you, lucky girl?   
9. http://www.burlesquebikinibootcamp.com/
10. Imagine someone in your life that loves you totally unconditionally.  Is it a parent? A sibling?  That nerdy boy that had a HUGE crush on you in 7th grade?  (And let’s be real, he probably still loves you, that shit never dies).  Close your eyes and imagine looking at yourself through their eyes.

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